Gonna wash that flu right out of my hands

I'm sure this has been covered elsewhere, but everyone* is clamoring for SFTC updates on swine flu, so I wanted to share the following thoughts:

First, with all of the talk of quarantines and school closings and everything else, it seems like we're supposed to be scared shitless of this unprecedented pandemic. But the experts keep telling us that the way to prevent this horrible, deadly disease is by washing our hands? That makes me a lot less worried: If Softsoap and agua are the keys to prevention, how bad can it be?

Oh, and my workplace has responded to this massive health threat by posting laminated placards with hand-washing instructions above every sink in every bathroom. I don't understand - are there some people who have been doing it wrong? (Now, wait: At what point do you actually dry your hands? Before or after the soap part?)

Second, this magic virus is changing names faster than P. Diddy in a witness protection program. Started as swine flu, of course, but now most everyone now seems like they're on board with the H1N1 moniker. I'm proposing - right here, right now - that the virus take the next step, and adopt as its new name a symbol, kind of like Prince did.

What do you think of this? ۞

* At most, one person.