Welcome to the long-awaited return of FfF. Apparently, it has been seven weeks since I've been able to come up with five comment-worthy subjects on a Friday, although - judging by what you're about to read - perhaps I should have waited seven more. You be the judge.
1. The good thing about Five for Friday is that even if each of the five items I write is only 21 percent as interesting as a standard SFTC post, you, the reader, still come out ahead.
2. As I've mentioned once before, for the last few years, I have been interested in approximately zero new TV series. Which was probably a good thing, since it gave me more time to do useful things like play word games on Merriam-Webster.com. Oh, yeah, and exercise.* Unfortunately, I'm at least moderately into four shows that have debuted since January. (How did network TV programmers know that one of my new year's resolutions was "watch way more television"?)
First among them is Trust Me, which follows Ed and Will (actually Conner and Mason, but you probably get what I mean) and their coworkers at a Chicago ad agency. Random Chicago references, the marketing world, and a good cast were enough to keep me tuning in the first few weeks, even though I thought it was all taking a while to come together. But either my senses have been dulled or Trust Me has sort of hit its stride in the last two weeks, and it's now a must-watch for me. The banter between the two main characters is always entertaining (not quite Rory-and-Lorelai-esque, but not bad) and Monica Potter's Sarah Krajicek-Hunter character (or maybe just Sarah Krajicek now) keeps getting more fun to watch.
I've also been tuning in to Lie to Me, perhaps because the name sounds so similar to Trust Me and I want to make sure I don't miss any Chicago ad agency hijinks. But also perhaps because it's almost exactly like House, M.D. - except that instead of watching Hugh Laurie unravel medical mysteries in spite of the lies his patients tell, we're watching Tim Roth unravel crime mysteries in spite of the lies his suspects tell.
Quickly, the other two shows I might have to keep watching are Castle, which manages to overcome major believability gaps because of the great lead characters, and The Unusuals, which debuted this week. Think of it as NYPD Blue meets... hmm... Mystery Men, except with less screen time for Dennis Franz's ass. It's tough to gauge after one episode, but if the Unusuals keeps up the uber-quirkiness combined with semi-realistic stories, I'll stay tuned.
3. Admit it. If you read a news story about a top-ranking intelligence official being photographed holding papers marked "SECRET" (apparently in capital letters, so you know it's serious) in such a way that the information on those papers was legible to anyone who zoomed in on the photo, well, you'd assume that the jackass in question was American. Nope, turns out they grow 'em dumb in England, too.
4. I realize the year is young, but I'd be willing to bet that I Love You, Man will hold its own for the next eight months and remain my favorite comedy of 2009. It wasn't an all-time great by any means, but I was thoroughly entertained and I laughed out loud several times. I'm just concerned that Hollywood is going to be unable to make a decent comedy that doesn't star either Paul Rudd, Jason Segel or Seth Rogen (who, almost miraculously, was not in ILYM) ever again. We'll see.
The movie scored extra points with me because Peter and Zooey (Rudd and Rashida Jones) get married June 30 in Santa Barbara. Which is pretty much exactly what my drop-dead gorgeous wife and I did. Cool, right? That same drop-dead gorgeous wife also made reservations for us at James Beach, the Venice restaurant where Peter and Sydney (Segel) have their first man-date. Fish tacos, here we come.
5. Apparently, someone out there took offense at my posts about octopi threatening to displace pirates as the "it" trend of the decade. Because, in case you missed it, pirates have muscled their way back into the headlines, hijacking stuff, and probably saying aaaargh and letting parrots hang out on their shoulders. I just hope that posting this item doesn't add fuel to the fire in the rivalry between eight-armed sea creatures and swashbuckling buccaneers.
Sadly, I fear we're headed for a massive octopus-vs.-pirate showdown on the high seas, sometime before the end of 2009. If that happens, you can be sure you'll read about it right here. You're welcome.
* Not so much on the exercise.
April 10, 2009
April 9, 2009
An SFTC public* service announcement
This might be too morbid, I don't know, but in the interest of the safety and security of SFTC readers - my favorite people in the world - I wanted to write a short post advising that you stay away from anything having to do with the Los Angeles Angels** this season.
It's just that they've had a bad run this week, with the death early this morning of a pitcher who had played in last night's game against the Oakland A's, and the death earlier this week of a fan who was beaten up while at the stadium. They're both tragic. But fans getting beaten to death inside stadiums seems like a big marketing problem for Major League Baseball. It's almost sure to erase some of the family-friendly appeal they like to promote.
Sadly, the news about the spectator's death is not hard to believe: As I've written before, I've seen plenty of fights and near fights at Dodger Stadium, including some that got very ugly. When I lived in Chicago, fights at Wrigley Field seemed pretty rare, but they were an occasional problem at U.S. Cellular Field, where the White Sox play.
Even if it means hiring security guards to stand in every seating section of every stadium in the country, MLB and the teams had better do something about fan violence, and quick. Let's keep the violence on the hockey rink where it belongs.
* To the extent that the dozen people who read this can be considered the "public."
** Loree: That's a Major League Baseball team.
It's just that they've had a bad run this week, with the death early this morning of a pitcher who had played in last night's game against the Oakland A's, and the death earlier this week of a fan who was beaten up while at the stadium. They're both tragic. But fans getting beaten to death inside stadiums seems like a big marketing problem for Major League Baseball. It's almost sure to erase some of the family-friendly appeal they like to promote.
Sadly, the news about the spectator's death is not hard to believe: As I've written before, I've seen plenty of fights and near fights at Dodger Stadium, including some that got very ugly. When I lived in Chicago, fights at Wrigley Field seemed pretty rare, but they were an occasional problem at U.S. Cellular Field, where the White Sox play.
Even if it means hiring security guards to stand in every seating section of every stadium in the country, MLB and the teams had better do something about fan violence, and quick. Let's keep the violence on the hockey rink where it belongs.
* To the extent that the dozen people who read this can be considered the "public."
** Loree: That's a Major League Baseball team.
April 7, 2009
Mad props
Things and/or people and/or dieties I'm mad at today:
The Michigan State Spartans. Not because I had money on the game, and not because I was particularly pulling for them to win the NCAA men's basketball championship last night - although, clearly, an MSU victory would have solved all of Michigan's problems - but because Sparty was so overmatched that I was bored silly watching the game. Like, fell-asleep-in-the-middle-of-the-first-half bored. That should not happen during March Madness.
(Aside: Whoever came up with all of the college basketball catchphrases - March Madness, Final Four, Elite Eight, Sweet Sixteen, Clark Kellogg - that person sure liked alliteration.)
Anyway, the game was such a disappointment that I was starved for entertainment, which meant I had to keep the TV on afterward to watch...
The ER series finale. Waiting for me on DVR from last Thursday was two hours of excellent entertainment. A perfectly fitting finale, I thought. I haven't watched ER regularly in about six years, but I thought the writers did a great job of bringing back some of the original characters in ways that actually made sense. Not to mention incorporating the enchanting Alexis Bledel as a young doctor. (One, Had she been a regular for a while? Two, Did I just write enchanting?) Nice also how the story and the action just kept going, right until the end, with little pause for sentiment and mush, a strong bookend to the series premiere.
(Aside 2: As you might remember, ER and Chicago Hope premiered the same week in September 1994. Those really were the salad days for Chicago-based medical ensemble dramas, weren't they? I was pretty sure at the time that Chicago Hope was the one that would be around longer. Oops.)
So why am I mad at ER? Because I was tired before watching ER and I really should have gone to sleep. But after two hours of unusually great TV, I was pretty geared up - I was craving more televised entertainment. Which meant staying up even later to watch me some rerun Letterman. (Which was a great move, because there were Stupid Pet Tricks, including this one, which cracked me way up.) Which means that I'm really freaking tired right now.
The baseball gods. Because on the strength of their Opening Day performances yesterday, I have hope that the Orioles (especially), Cubs and Dodgers all are on their way to the playoffs this year.
Which, because of pitching (Orioles), being the Cubs (Cubs) and pitching (Dodgers), they're probably not. So why did they have to get my hopes up?
Californians. Because now it looks like Iowans get it. And Vermonters (?) get it. And Golden Staters, who always seems to make a racket about being the people who set trends on these kinds of things, still do not get the idea that adults who want to get married should just be able to get married. Period.
That's a lot of mad so far, I know. But the day is young.
The Michigan State Spartans. Not because I had money on the game, and not because I was particularly pulling for them to win the NCAA men's basketball championship last night - although, clearly, an MSU victory would have solved all of Michigan's problems - but because Sparty was so overmatched that I was bored silly watching the game. Like, fell-asleep-in-the-middle-of-the-first-half bored. That should not happen during March Madness.
(Aside: Whoever came up with all of the college basketball catchphrases - March Madness, Final Four, Elite Eight, Sweet Sixteen, Clark Kellogg - that person sure liked alliteration.)
Anyway, the game was such a disappointment that I was starved for entertainment, which meant I had to keep the TV on afterward to watch...
The ER series finale. Waiting for me on DVR from last Thursday was two hours of excellent entertainment. A perfectly fitting finale, I thought. I haven't watched ER regularly in about six years, but I thought the writers did a great job of bringing back some of the original characters in ways that actually made sense. Not to mention incorporating the enchanting Alexis Bledel as a young doctor. (One, Had she been a regular for a while? Two, Did I just write enchanting?) Nice also how the story and the action just kept going, right until the end, with little pause for sentiment and mush, a strong bookend to the series premiere.
(Aside 2: As you might remember, ER and Chicago Hope premiered the same week in September 1994. Those really were the salad days for Chicago-based medical ensemble dramas, weren't they? I was pretty sure at the time that Chicago Hope was the one that would be around longer. Oops.)
So why am I mad at ER? Because I was tired before watching ER and I really should have gone to sleep. But after two hours of unusually great TV, I was pretty geared up - I was craving more televised entertainment. Which meant staying up even later to watch me some rerun Letterman. (Which was a great move, because there were Stupid Pet Tricks, including this one, which cracked me way up.) Which means that I'm really freaking tired right now.
The baseball gods. Because on the strength of their Opening Day performances yesterday, I have hope that the Orioles (especially), Cubs and Dodgers all are on their way to the playoffs this year.
Which, because of pitching (Orioles), being the Cubs (Cubs) and pitching (Dodgers), they're probably not. So why did they have to get my hopes up?
Californians. Because now it looks like Iowans get it. And Vermonters (?) get it. And Golden Staters, who always seems to make a racket about being the people who set trends on these kinds of things, still do not get the idea that adults who want to get married should just be able to get married. Period.
That's a lot of mad so far, I know. But the day is young.
April 3, 2009
VIP treatment
From what I can tell, most of the savvy people who read this blog couldn't care less about professional sports. But "writing to my audience" isn't one of my great strengths, so I'm still going to tell you that I am very excited that baseball opening day is this weekend.
(Caveat: No sports knowledge needed to enjoy the rest of this post, I promise.)
Actually, maybe I'm more excited about the idea of opening day than about opening day itself.* Because the one team I really root for, the Orioles, has almost no hope. And although I enjoy the occasional trip to Dodger Stadium, I spent most of my time at Dodgers games last year watching drunken assholes threaten to beat each other up (last half of this post, for example), which is sort of a waste of time.
So to celebrate the beginning of another baseball season, I was trying to come up with an inspiring baseball story for you, and the closest I could get was this fond football-related memory. It'll have to do:
In the early 1980s, my grandfather had a work-related connection that enabled him to become friendly with several New York Jets players and the Jets' head coach, Walt Michaels. Once, as a present, he got Coach Michaels to sign a green-and-white business card that proclaimed me an honorary assistant coach.
I probably still have that card somewhere - because I still have approximately everything I ever owned during the 80s - but at the time, I carried it with me everywhere. You know, just in case I needed to impress the ladies.**
This was back when the Colts were where they belonged - in Baltimore - and for a few years in a row, my grandfather would come visit us when the New York Jets were in town to treat my family to a game. One time, we were running kind of late, and we arrived at Memorial Stadium seconds before kickoff. Every parking spot within a mile of the stadium would be filled. We were facing a long walk and the prospect of missing critical Jets-Colts action.
Driving the family Buick, my grandfather ignored all of the LOT FULL signs and brazenly pulled into the stadium's VIP lot, which seemed odd because not only was it reserved for VIPs, but, as you know, it was full.
His left hand on the steering wheel, he stuck his right toward me in the back seat. "Do you still have your assistant coach card?" he asked. I reached into my wallet and pressed the card into his palm, just as we pulled up to a confused parking attendant.
"Here," my grandfather said, shoving my very unofficial credential into the guy's face. "I'm a Jets assistant coach. Need to get in right away!" My grandfather looked back at me and winked.
The attendant quickly handed the card back and pointed us to a vacant spot just yards away from the stadium entrance. We were in our seats for the opening kickoff.
I don't remember anything else about the game, but it's hard to forget that kick-ass parking spot.
SFTC Shoutout: A quick thanks to SFTC's newest "Followers" (sounds cultish, but really isn't). Thrilled to have you aboard the SFTC train this week. When we have our almost-inevitable IPO, you'll obviously cash in big time.*** If you haven't signed up yet, please do. I think you just have to click the "follow" button in the box near the top of the right column over there >>>
It's free, it's fun and it tastes great!
* I think I'm bastardizing a phrase from When Harry Met Sally here. If you can confirm, please do.
** This didn't work.
*** Technically, I don't think that really makes sense, and the IPO is probably not so much "inevitable" as it is "not even a remote possibility," but the point is that I'm glad you're among the first to show your faces (or joysticks, as the case may be) on the site.
(Caveat: No sports knowledge needed to enjoy the rest of this post, I promise.)
Actually, maybe I'm more excited about the idea of opening day than about opening day itself.* Because the one team I really root for, the Orioles, has almost no hope. And although I enjoy the occasional trip to Dodger Stadium, I spent most of my time at Dodgers games last year watching drunken assholes threaten to beat each other up (last half of this post, for example), which is sort of a waste of time.
So to celebrate the beginning of another baseball season, I was trying to come up with an inspiring baseball story for you, and the closest I could get was this fond football-related memory. It'll have to do:
In the early 1980s, my grandfather had a work-related connection that enabled him to become friendly with several New York Jets players and the Jets' head coach, Walt Michaels. Once, as a present, he got Coach Michaels to sign a green-and-white business card that proclaimed me an honorary assistant coach.
I probably still have that card somewhere - because I still have approximately everything I ever owned during the 80s - but at the time, I carried it with me everywhere. You know, just in case I needed to impress the ladies.**
This was back when the Colts were where they belonged - in Baltimore - and for a few years in a row, my grandfather would come visit us when the New York Jets were in town to treat my family to a game. One time, we were running kind of late, and we arrived at Memorial Stadium seconds before kickoff. Every parking spot within a mile of the stadium would be filled. We were facing a long walk and the prospect of missing critical Jets-Colts action.
Driving the family Buick, my grandfather ignored all of the LOT FULL signs and brazenly pulled into the stadium's VIP lot, which seemed odd because not only was it reserved for VIPs, but, as you know, it was full.
His left hand on the steering wheel, he stuck his right toward me in the back seat. "Do you still have your assistant coach card?" he asked. I reached into my wallet and pressed the card into his palm, just as we pulled up to a confused parking attendant.
"Here," my grandfather said, shoving my very unofficial credential into the guy's face. "I'm a Jets assistant coach. Need to get in right away!" My grandfather looked back at me and winked.
The attendant quickly handed the card back and pointed us to a vacant spot just yards away from the stadium entrance. We were in our seats for the opening kickoff.
I don't remember anything else about the game, but it's hard to forget that kick-ass parking spot.
SFTC Shoutout: A quick thanks to SFTC's newest "Followers" (sounds cultish, but really isn't). Thrilled to have you aboard the SFTC train this week. When we have our almost-inevitable IPO, you'll obviously cash in big time.*** If you haven't signed up yet, please do. I think you just have to click the "follow" button in the box near the top of the right column over there >>>
It's free, it's fun and it tastes great!
* I think I'm bastardizing a phrase from When Harry Met Sally here. If you can confirm, please do.
** This didn't work.
*** Technically, I don't think that really makes sense, and the IPO is probably not so much "inevitable" as it is "not even a remote possibility," but the point is that I'm glad you're among the first to show your faces (or joysticks, as the case may be) on the site.
April 2, 2009
CNN.com: Dead horse. Me: Kicking
Taking a quick break from writing about English muffins...
I guess it's not really fair anymore to pick on CNN's web site. Everyone who reads it anymore must realize that it's not so much a news site as it is a glorified blog that runs a "Breaking News" or "Developing Story" banner in bright colors every time a building collapses or President Obama speaks in front of TV cameras.
But when you resort to writing headlines that sound like elementary school playground taunts... and your "reporting" entails quoting bloggers whose expertise is collecting other people's stories... well, it might be time to just give up.
My only other concern is that CNN does not seem to be offering that scrumptious headline on a nice cotton t-shirt. What a letdown.
I guess it's not really fair anymore to pick on CNN's web site. Everyone who reads it anymore must realize that it's not so much a news site as it is a glorified blog that runs a "Breaking News" or "Developing Story" banner in bright colors every time a building collapses or President Obama speaks in front of TV cameras.
But when you resort to writing headlines that sound like elementary school playground taunts... and your "reporting" entails quoting bloggers whose expertise is collecting other people's stories... well, it might be time to just give up.
My only other concern is that CNN does not seem to be offering that scrumptious headline on a nice cotton t-shirt. What a letdown.
April 1, 2009
Biting the mail... update added
Just posted a quick update to the Wolferman's English muffins saga. See the end of the previous post, below.
Thanks for all the interest!
Thanks for all the interest!
Biting the mail-order catalog that feeds me?
Well, this might be disappointing.
When I wrote yesterday about the deliciousness that awaited me in my newly delivered package of Wolferman's English muffins, I sort of figured that at some point - the Internet being what it is, and Google being what it is - someone from Wolferman's would find the post. If nothing else, I'd have brightened the day of someone at the company (maybe even a distant relative of Louis Wolferman). That would have been just fine.
I wrote that I'd welcome a package of English muffins in exchange for the unsolicited testimonial - that was just a joke. Realistically, though, I thought that someone from the company might even leave a pleasant note acknowledging the post.
Sure enough - according to my trusty Feedjit widget, over there >> near the bottom of the right column - SFTC started attracting an unusual amount of traffic from Medford, Ore., where Wolferman's is based. (Actually, any amount of traffic from Medford would have been unusual, so it was pretty easy to spot.) A few clicks last night and five so far this morning. See for yourself (click to enlarge):
So I was kind of stoked, figuring that the tasty muffin folks had found my glowing report and that, just maybe, I'd brought a little sunshine to someone's day. Because, as you know, that's how I roll.
Then, about 30 minutes ago, at exactly the time that those five Medford clicks were happening, I got a comment from... well, from "Anonymous."
Want to guess what the comment was? Let's go multiple choice!
A. Thanks for the plug! So glad you like the muffins.
B. I'm writing from Wolferman's. Enjoying the blog.
C. Checked out the site and found this great deal - 12 pack of muffins..you choose the flavor for $29.95 + free delivery
D. Tell us your address so we can send you some more muffins, on the house!
The correct answer is... C.
That's right. The response for writing about my love affair with the world's best $2 English muffins was an anonymous comment - I know I'm going out on a limb, but could it possibly have been a sneaky person from company HQ?!? - suggesting that I go drop another $30 on the damn things.
(Also? Good christ, I just ordered two dozen - how many freaking muffins do you think I can eat before they get stale?)
All I can say is.... well, I'll let Jeff Tweedy sing it for me.
***
UPDATE, 3:15 p.m. PT: Cindy from Wolferman's corporate relations got in touch (click Comments link below to view) with a nice big "thanks" for the original post. She also said that although this kind of thing does fall under her group's responsibilities, she couldn't figure out who would have posted the anonymous comment with the sales pitch as a response to yesterday's post but she was looking into it.
Better yet, she offered to send more English muffins and other Wolferman's goodies! (my first BIF, or blog-induced freebie!), which I just might share with some pals at the office. If they're really nice.
Another happy result of this little storyline is that today was the busiest single day for traffic on SFTC so far. Which can only mean that you people must really love reading about English muffins. I'll have to keep that in mind. (Also, thanks, Loree and Laura.)
When I wrote yesterday about the deliciousness that awaited me in my newly delivered package of Wolferman's English muffins, I sort of figured that at some point - the Internet being what it is, and Google being what it is - someone from Wolferman's would find the post. If nothing else, I'd have brightened the day of someone at the company (maybe even a distant relative of Louis Wolferman). That would have been just fine.
I wrote that I'd welcome a package of English muffins in exchange for the unsolicited testimonial - that was just a joke. Realistically, though, I thought that someone from the company might even leave a pleasant note acknowledging the post.
Sure enough - according to my trusty Feedjit widget, over there >> near the bottom of the right column - SFTC started attracting an unusual amount of traffic from Medford, Ore., where Wolferman's is based. (Actually, any amount of traffic from Medford would have been unusual, so it was pretty easy to spot.) A few clicks last night and five so far this morning. See for yourself (click to enlarge):
So I was kind of stoked, figuring that the tasty muffin folks had found my glowing report and that, just maybe, I'd brought a little sunshine to someone's day. Because, as you know, that's how I roll.
Then, about 30 minutes ago, at exactly the time that those five Medford clicks were happening, I got a comment from... well, from "Anonymous."
Want to guess what the comment was? Let's go multiple choice!
A. Thanks for the plug! So glad you like the muffins.
B. I'm writing from Wolferman's. Enjoying the blog.
C. Checked out the site and found this great deal - 12 pack of muffins..you choose the flavor for $29.95 + free delivery
D. Tell us your address so we can send you some more muffins, on the house!
The correct answer is... C.
That's right. The response for writing about my love affair with the world's best $2 English muffins was an anonymous comment - I know I'm going out on a limb, but could it possibly have been a sneaky person from company HQ?!? - suggesting that I go drop another $30 on the damn things.
(Also? Good christ, I just ordered two dozen - how many freaking muffins do you think I can eat before they get stale?)
All I can say is.... well, I'll let Jeff Tweedy sing it for me.
***
UPDATE, 3:15 p.m. PT: Cindy from Wolferman's corporate relations got in touch (click Comments link below to view) with a nice big "thanks" for the original post. She also said that although this kind of thing does fall under her group's responsibilities, she couldn't figure out who would have posted the anonymous comment with the sales pitch as a response to yesterday's post but she was looking into it.
Better yet, she offered to send more English muffins and other Wolferman's goodies! (my first BIF, or blog-induced freebie!), which I just might share with some pals at the office. If they're really nice.
Another happy result of this little storyline is that today was the busiest single day for traffic on SFTC so far. Which can only mean that you people must really love reading about English muffins. I'll have to keep that in mind. (Also, thanks, Loree and Laura.)
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